Being good parents in modern days is not an easy thing to do, so millions of couples are studying various books and manuals on how to properly treat their child. Many moms and dads have already achieved success. So, what's their secret? What rules do they follow to create a harmonious relationship with their children?
In this article, we are going to reveal the secrets. Let's dive right in.
What Is Expected Of The Modern Parents
Times have changed, for the better in many ways. Fathers are required to perform in equal parts the tasks previously reserved for the mother, while still responding to the role of authority but without raising their voice, or losing their roles. So, they are still expected to be the ones who enforce the rules on their children and the new thing would be to do it in a certain way.
These expectations are, like everything idealized, impossible to achieve, which guarantees frustration both for those who want it and for those who expect it, that is, those who live with it. All this leads to many nights being moments of discussion between what corresponds to each one of us and what we do not fulfill, with immediate consequences in the family chaos.
Generational challenges are both inevitable and necessary. This is the era in which we live and we are subject to the changes in form and substance to which society is pushing us. However, in order not to be overwhelmed by the demands of the environment, it is necessary to reflect on the crossroads that parenthood implies, between the style of each one vs. how it "should" be.
Modern Parenting Tips 2020
Each family has its own rules and regulations. The pedagogical approach may be different, this is a purely individual process. Parenting may vary, but there are universal tips that you can follow to be successful modern parents.
- Instill positive thinking. Children take an example from you. If you look at the world positively and look for pluses in everything, then this will reflect well on the child. He takes over your life position. This does not mean see through the "rose-colored glasses". You can remain realistic, but be positive.
- Since our children literally learn everything about the world from us, there is no need to set boundaries. Without them, children will feel anxious and worried.
You can set boundaries using criticism and shame, or you can set boundaries in a firm but respectful way. Think about how you would prefer to be talked to and act on that.
- Advice for parents on raising their children is not limited to relationships and education only. The child should be inoculated from a young age. Do you want your son or daughter to wake up in a good mood and cheerful? Then the awakening and preparation for bed should take place at the same time. The same rule applies to eating habits. Children who eat on the schedule are less sick and less likely to have stomach problems. Try to make the diet more varied.
- Parents are not supposed to discuss relationships and financial matters in front of a child. They shouldn't blame each other for the mistakes made by the baby. "That's what you do, you taught him!" First of all, the baby has a hard time with Mom and Dad fighting. He feels guilty about this problem, thinks he's bad. Secondly, the child may think that his misdemeanor is justified and anyone should be punished, but not him. "That's what Dad taught him"
- Highlight the positive traits. Children are receptive and easy to compel. Focus more on the positive traits you should strive for. Look for them in the behavior of the child, heroes of fairy tales, cartoons. Kind, diligent, brave, well-mannered.
- No need to come up with "evils" who will take the baby. Of course, this is the easiest way to influence the child and calm him down. But such intimidation traumatizes children, they laden empty fears in them. Then it will be difficult for you to teach your baby to sleep in his room. Better explain why you can’t behave like that, what it can lead to.
- Don't make your dreams come true in children. Every man has his own interests and his own life path. You may have dreamed of being an athlete or an accountant. But the child has an opinion about it. If he dreams of linking life to art or modern technology, let him do it. The child may quickly lose interest in the activity, but the main thing is that he has tried and gained useful experience. It's worse when children blame their parents for not giving them at least a chance.
- Allow your children to be independent. When a child wants to help wash the dishes, you probably immediately imagined a wet floor, foam on the walls, and broken plates. Standard answer: "I myself." And so in many ways. Thank you for your help and allow me to take part in the cleaning. If the task is too difficult, find an alternative: water the flowers, collect linen from the dryer, arrange the dishes in their places. If you reject the help of children, then they do not see the need for it. It will be something new to them when they are 10 years old to learn that they need to clean up and be independent.
- Praise, encourage decent deeds. Parental approval is important for the child, even in adulthood. Support will motivate the child to conquer new heights. It will indicate in which direction to go further, as a guide to life.
- Do not demand too much from the child. Especially after watching celebrity tapes with their gifted children, the TV show "Best of All" and articles about the smartest kids. Development should proceed at a pace comfortable for the child.
- Tips for parents on parenting of preschool children include familiarization with the rules of conduct. Tell us what is good and what is bad. What seems to parents elementary, the child may not know. Pay attention not only to mental development but also to society.
With regard to the education of children, it is important for parents to build the right relationship.
- Your opinion should be authoritative. The child should feel the difference between children and adults. Speak convincingly and do not change your decisions under the pressure of children's tears. The child becomes spoiled and starts to manipulate the elders. The boundaries of the allowed are blurred because what was forbidden an hour ago, you can already do. It was enough to get hysterical with screaming and stomping his legs. Modern parents often wonder how not to raise a child capricious, infantile, selfish.
- Talk to the baby. It reinforces your connection. He gets more information, develops, learns to talk. He starts to understand what's appropriate and what's not. Developing social skills is a complex process, but communicating with a parent is a first and important step.
- Do not replace or measure your love with toys and expensive purchases. This is a change in values. Try to spend time every day, even when your schedule is busy and you are tired after work. These moments are priceless. Constantly putting off your time together, you break the binding thread. The child grows older and at some point, you can find that you have become strangers. Communicate at dinner, before going to bed, go for walks, attend events together.
- A good parent is not the one who doesn't fight. Punishment is a forced but indispensable measure in the educational process. Do it for a good reason. Don't shout, don't make comparisons, don't be cruel. There is an article about how to scold a child correctly.
- You talk about your feelings more often. Hugs, kisses, pat on the head, it's all nice for a child. He feels needed and loved. Such children are more active, purposeful, they are less likely to have psychological problems. They are easier to cope with failures because at an early age they felt the support of their loved ones.
- Parents should not avoid the topics of sexual education of children. If a child has any questions, be sure to satisfy curiosity. Do not leave the child unanswered. The answer should be clear to the child, so choose the right words. If the child is too young to know the truth, then satisfy the interest in some part. You'll tell the rest later.
Parenting has changed in this modern era but if you cope with the process you’ll be a great parent.